Life is Hard, They Say
According to the beliefs of society, Life is hard. Most of us have bought into or agreed with this belief without question. When who we are contradicts this, instead of assuming that what we were taught about life is wrong, we believe that we are wrong. When we look at our astrological charts for example, we often see contradictory or less than ideal energies that make up our personalities. We don’t want life to be hard, but it is. We see these aspects about ourselves as further evidence. Consequently, this makes life even harder.
For example, I’m a Taurus Sun. Both my Moon and Venus are in Aries, and my Mars is in Libra. Not particularly awesome placements for a life meant to be lived the hard way. The Aries energy makes me emotionally intolerant, and remarkably resistant to anything that doesn’t feel good to me. My Libra energy favors balance and harmony, and is much more interested in ease than hard labor. My Taurus Sun is not interested whatsoever in doing anything rushed or hurried. The fact that I’m also a Vedic Taurus, just hammers that point home.
In my youth I was called lazy, self-absorbed and bratty for not wanting to participate in the struggles of life like everyone else did. I always wanted to do things the easy way. I was taught these qualities were something to be ashamed of. I was taught I needed to change who I was and conform. Don’t get me wrong, I did try to conform. For a very long time, I believed that I was wrong. Ironically, this did make my life harder. They got what they wanted. I was miserable.
I just couldn’t seem to change the qualities that were so opposed to accepting suffering as a fact of life. After resisting myself and struggling endlessly, it finally hit me. Maybe there isn’t actually anything wrong with me. Maybe I refuse to participate when life is hard because maybe, it wasn’t meant to be…
Now, I’m not talking about avoidance of challenging tasks or an unwillingness to put forth effort. I’m talking about life being hard in the way that feels like beating your head against a wall. I’m talking about the belief that allows people to stay in bad situations simply because they believe life is just like that. I eventually learned that my natural resistance to this notion, once I embraced it, is what set me free.
Finding the Blessings
You see, the gift of Aries is honoring the self above all else. Libra demands harmony and ease. The blessing of Taurus energy is taking the pace of nature. It is not the avoidance of work, but rather working through the path of least resistance. Taurus is the embodiment of working smarter, not harder. Taurus energy is not lazy, it is efficient and honors natural rhythms. Embracing these qualities about myself allowed me to begin to question the belief about life instead of constantly questioning myself. Now, when I am faced with these hard walls, I do not accept that it’s just the way it has to be. I trust the resistance I feel as valid. I look for another way.
I honor myself and my feelings. I look for the path of ease and harmony. I move with the natural flow of my own cycles, the moon, and the seasons. When life gets hard, I question it. Does it have to be this way? Is there a different perspective or approach I can take to ease the burden? Can I take some time out and re-evaluate and realign with my truth? Sometimes the answer is no. Sometimes the hard way is the only way. More often then not, the answer is yes.
When life gets hard, not challenging, but hard, I encourage you to take a moment and question whether or not it has to be that way. Simply asking the question will begin to open up new avenues you may not have considered before. Challenges require us to dig deeper and expand who we are. That is a blessing. When life is hard, to the point it doesn’t feel good or depletes your sense of worth and wellbeing, the challenge is to surrender back into honoring yourself.
The first step is to accept the situation as it is. The second is to accept yourself as you are. Acknowledge that these two things are not compatible in the moment. Sure, put forth the effort just to make sure you aren’t being avoidant, but if the situation remains immovable and/or painful, take a step back. Examine the wall that you have hit. Find a way around it or over it. Find a window. Find a door. Whatever you do, do not continue to beat your head up against it simply because you have accepted the belief that Life is Hard.
The Moral of the Story
The lesson here is two-fold. The first is that the qualities about yourself that you have deemed problematic, all have a valid and positive reason for existing. You just have to stop assuming that they mean something is wrong with you. Ask yourself, what if these qualities are absolutely good? How does your perspective of them change? How can you see positive ways they can be utilized? When you run into a situation they seem incompatible with, consider it is the situation that is incompatible with you instead. How can you transform the situation at hand? How can you change your perspective, or approach to be more in alignment with the truth of who you are?
Second, the idea that life has to be hard is false. Your life was designed to flow effortlessly in harmony with the truth of your being. There will be times you will have to effort more than others, but nothing should feel insurmountable. The feeling of something being too hard is a clear sign that you need to step back, realign with yourself and re-evaluate the situation.
If you need assistance coming into greater alignment with your most authentic self, check out The Goddess School at Gone Goddess Academy